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It's Espresso..Not expresso!

Extraction of coffee in a traditional espresso machineWe get it. Everyone has a right to believe what they want to, to be who they want to be and to be respected for their views. We’ve come to accept that if we “do no harm” we can all share this planet no matter what we believe…. a world where mutual respect and a reserved judgment allow us to live in peace with each other.

BUT…. I have to draw a line in the sand and say that there is a limit to this.

A limit to my tolerance and non-judgemental attitude. A line that when crossed leads me to thoughts of a psychopathic nature and thankfully for all, I don’t have access to the “little red nuke button” because I would have pressed it a few hundred times by now. It’s a line that starts and ends with the word “eXpresso”.

Well let’s just say the issue for me is that there is no such word. It’s an abomination! A creation so heinous and evil that we have to rise up and destroy it.  

Does anyone go around calling a bus… a “buX” or a house… a “houXe”?

No! So why do some insist on calling an “espresso” an “eXpresso?” Poor Angelo Moriondo who invented what was to become known as the espresso making process and Luigi Bezzerra, Desiderio Pavoni and finally Achille Gaggia, who developed the machinery to make this a reality. They must be turning in their graves (or choking on their coffee) seething with the injustice of it all!

So where did this deviancy originate? Late-night drunken party goers arriving at a café and asking for “eXXXspreshho”? Well no, as strange as it sounds, it appears that so-called civilised English speakers are responsible for this cancerous term!

Taking the word “espresso”, they associated it with the process of “eXpressing” water through ground coffee. It didn’t help that the espresso making process was faster than the filter coffee process either, because some bright spark then saw fit to see it as an “eXpress” or fast method of making coffee…. and named it so.

Then on a really gloomy day, somewhere in the world, the two came together when someone in a mad rush asked a café owner for an “eXpress eXpressed coffee” and that was that… we were doomed forever!

The situation is precarious. Even the Merriam Webster and Collins dictionaries have been infiltrated and have sold out with an actual definition. The world knows not what these eXpresso saboteurs have planned next for us. If they can randomly replace “S” with “X” are we to “Xee our civiliXation diXappear aX they randomly make theXe changeX to our language and Xociety?”. What letter will they choose to replace next with their “X”? Look out “G” we are “cominX to Xet you!

Isn’t it time we all took a stand here to defend liberty and freedom by removing this cancerous term from our civilised world before it spreads further? Be bold and speak out when you are in the queue at Starbucks and someone asks for an “eXpresso” … but be gentle for they know not what they say. A simple quiet aside with that poor soul is all that is needed. Your mentorship and guidance will be appreciated as they then rush to tell five friends who in turn will tell five friends and before we know it, the world will be free of tyranny, dictatorship, war and hatred.

Imagine a world where we all live in harmony; where we can be more accepting of each other and our differences; and a world where we are far less judgemental. You can. All it takes is for us to banish “that” word. Start now, start today, there is no time to lose. Let’s do it!   

 

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